Neon Signs
by Siege Of Madrigal
Summary: Matt Murdock died in the collapse of Midland Circle. In result, the Hand was defeated and the Defenders disbanded. Jessica believes he's dead. She thinks it was her fault. Unbeknownst to the group, Daredevil is alive under the care of nuns and his own mother. New enemies and threats will arise. The Defenders will have to learn to defend each other to take out what's coming next.
1. So the Snow Falls

**AN** **: Ever since Defenders released, I've been obsessed with these two together. I've been inspired to return to writing because of these two. I will be making lots of stories based around these two. I just. hope they don't suck, however I'm confident in my new writing skills since I was last invested on this site. Here's the first chapter of the story. I hope it goes well.**

* * *

It's been a month and a half since the fall of the Hand. Jessica laid in bed, tired and filled to the brink with alcohol. She could smell it's scent on her own breath. She hasn't slept for a straight week and has had trouble sleeping for the last month or so. She stares up at the ceiling, slowly tracing the cracks in the plaster of the ceiling with her eyes, watching as one crack spliced with another. She'd done this so many times, she knew the direction and curves of the cracks by heart. If she wasn't half drunk out of her mind, she could probably draw them on a piece of paper.

She continued focusing all her attention into the ceiling above her; waiting for it to cave in on her. To collapse. _Collapse,_ she thought. Like Midland Circle collapsed in the middle of New York City. Like it buckled and took him from her.

 _Matt._

The name ran through her mind rapidly. No matter where she was or what she was doing sometimes, somehow it popped into her head. She had barely known him. That's what it felt like. Yet there wasn't a day gone by since the events of Midland Circle that she hadn't thought about him. She finally took her eyes away from the ceiling and turned to her right, focusing on the scarf that rested on the nightstand along with her favorite flask.

 _"It's your scarf."_

His words repeatedly ran through her mind with the pace of a nascar in first place. It felt as if they stung in the back of her head. She reached over to grab the flask and downed a couple more shots before dropping it on the floor after realizing it was empty. She grabbed the scarf and brought it closer. Cuddled with it. _Her_ scarf was all she had left of _him._ Sometimes she slept with it for comfort or for when she thought it was too cold. If she paid close enough attention, sometimes she thought she could smell him on the scarf. Jessica closed her eyes and it was as if he was there for just a second. She opened her eyes and quickly comes back to reality.

She'd use it to wipe away the tears that threatened to fall. She'd cried the most during the first week. She tried to control it and had gotten better with it over the course of the last month, but Matt Murdock didn't make it any easier for her.

All this time Jessica had pent herself up with guilt. The guilt of having not at least tried to change his mind. To save him. To get him to see that Elektra was really gone and that staying down there was suicide. To maybe help him realize that he was being a total idiot.

 _"Fucking martyrs."_

The depression. The overall misery of not having him around anymore. They had only started to get to know each other right before Midland Circle. They trusted each other. Even if she hated to admit it, she trusted him with her life. The worst part of it was that she never got to hear his story. Only bits and pieces. Not in a way he would have told her. She bled into his past. Pried even, but he never seemed to push her away because of it. The smile she got out of him all the time was almost welcoming. This made her angry. It frustrated her.

 _All he got out of her was a goddamn file._

* * *

Jessica looked at the lawyer sitting in front of her. The smile on his face made it so hard to resist punching it _off_ his face, but she couldn't because she had no real reason to. Just another thing to get into trouble for.

 _"Private Investigator, Jessica Jones, punches stubborn blind man."_ The thought of it made her want to snicker, but she held it back. While not intrigued nor in the mood to deal with this bullshit, she decided to play it the way she usually does in hopes he'd just fuck off.

The blind lawyer began questioning her. "Ms. Jones, may I ask how long you've been a PI?"

She looked at him with a bland expression on her face. "No."

Matt was befuddled at her attitude. Surprised, as if he couldn't believe he'd just spoke to him like that. "Are you always this rude to people trying to help you?"

She gave an exasperated sigh and rolled her eyes. "You know what, I'm gonna find my own lawyer, thanks."

Matt seemed totally puzzled. Confused, almost. Why was this woman so hard stricken on receiving help?

"Okay. Uh, well, in reality, you don't need one. After talking to the lead detective outside, it appears that despite the mess you got yourself into, the NYPD doesn't actually have anything to hold you on, so-"

She carelessly interrupted him. "So I can walk?"

"Mm-hmm. Though your apartment and office are still considered an active crime scene. You'll need to make yourself available for follow-up questions, - so in the meantime - don't leave town."

Jessica spoke in an irritated tone now. She was on the verge of shoving him out of the way. "Yeah, I know the drill."

Matt started to drop the good lawyer act. Behind his glasses, he faced her and stared her dead in the eyes with his unseeing ones. "Ms. Jones, may uh, look, there's no easy way to say this." He paused for a moment, almost hesitating to finish what he was about to say.

"I read your _file_. I know who you are. What you can do. I know what happened with Kilgrave, so if-"

Jessica froze for a moment as he heard the name flow out of his mouth and into her ears.

"This has nothing to do with that."

"Okay, great." Matt almost seemed annoyed with her attitude now. He let himself simmer down before continuing.

"I'm just saying, legally, if there's anything, this will stay between us if there was anything not, uh, ordinary about this case."

Jessica was pissed off now. The lawyer was getting on her nerves. She did like a few things about him though. Things that only she points out in people. Like most, he was aware of her abilities, but unlike most and despite his handicap...he was still consistent. And he wasn't _ugly_ or anything.

"What part of "I know the drill" did you not understand? Nothing happened. I'm good," she repeated, more harshly this time around.

"Great," he finished. He wore that fake grin again, trying to hide any sign of surrender or defeat, but didn't do so well with concealing it in his tone of voice.

"Then I guess you're free to go."

Jessica coldly stared at him for a few more seconds before getting up, putting her jacket on and pushing the door to the interrogation room wide open, leaving Matt baffled as he stressfully rubbed his nose with a couple of his fingers.

* * *

" _He was only trying to help,"_ she thought as she rubbed her eyelids with her thumb and pointer finger. When Jessica closed her eyes and tried to sleep, she thought about him again. She thought about him tracking her down at Midland Circle. The way he grabbed her arm and tried pulling her away from it. Trying to keep her from danger...which is what she originally wanted in the first place. Jessica began thinking of why he did a lot of the things he did.

At the thought of it all, Jessica unwillingly let a tear slide down her cheek. Matt knew she was capable. Knew she was strong, but he didn't back down. He didn't see her as a victim. He was so worried about Jessica putting herself in harm's way.

As she uses the scarf to wipe away the tear, more threatened to release. His voice began to reel in her head once more.

 _"This is exactly what I was trying to avoid."_

She realized that as he tried stepping in to stop her getting involved with the situation at Midland Circle, it wasn't because he was ignorant of her abilities. He sure as hell didn't underestimate her. He saw _himself_ in her. He saw a reflection of himself, barreling headfirst into the same dire battles. He tried saving her...again and again.

She recalls the second encounter with Murakami at Trish's meeting. She was in way over her head. She had super strength, and healing, but not durability. Before she knew it, she was pinned on the ground and dazed. She saw the man pull his knife and he was two seconds away from stabbing her, but there he was. Matt arrived at the right time. He always _did,_ now that she thought about it.

" _Nice ears,"_ was all she could think to say after he'd just saved her life.

 _"They're horns,"_ he replied with a sly smile on the bottom half of his face.

 _Fuck you, Murdock. Screw you and your horns._

* * *

Jessica slowly paced around his apartment. It was warm and cozy. Comfortable. Basically the exact opposite of her place. She was almost jealous. _Almost._ She turned around and looked up, slightly blushing as she, not intentionally, looked up in Matt's direction, who was changing out of his Daredevil costume; shirtless in the moment. She hoped he couldn't sense the slight rush of warmth in her cheeks. He knew a lot of weird shit she never even came close to understanding.

 _"Man, did he have a lot of scars or what?"_

He turned around and she saw the disaster that was his back. He had only a few scars there, but long ones. Of course she studied his abdominal area.

 _"Not bad at all, Murdock."_

She took her attention away after realizing she was just staring at him for _way_ too long. She escaped that thought and kept studying his apartment. "You wanna tell me how a pro bono lawyer can afford a loft like this in New York City?"

"You can't tell now, but there's a neon billboard across the street. Keeps most people up at night-"

Jessica walked towards the window and peaked outside. She saw the large sign on the building from across the street. She instantly thought of the moment when she, Matt, Luke, and Danny were hiding in the restaurant.

 _"Who the hell hears neon?"_ Luke asked.

" _My blind-but-maybe-not lawyer."_ She replied _._

Jessica shook her head for a moment and returned to the present as she heard him add "-not me!" to the end of his sentence.

 _"I guess that's how he learned what neon sounds like. God, Matt is so weird,"_ she thought to herself.

"Got it!" she responded.

She turned away from the window as she heard Matt's footsteps getting closer. He was just finishing up buttoning his collar shirt. She instantly remembered what she had seen just a few minutes ago and turned away, concealing something almost foreign to her. A real smile. Not a fake one, not like the one she used to deceive Kilgrave. This one was real. Not that he could see it anyways...could he?

Jessica started rummaging through the boxes he had piled on a stool. She noticed a trophy. She picked it up and read the engraving on the label: "Jack Murdock." She put the trophy back and examined the boxing gloves right next to it. It was here that she put another two and two together.

"Plus, I occasionally help the landlord out. Not proud of it, but I put on the suit and rough up people late on rent."

She rolled her eyes, but smiled...again. "I hope that's a joke."

Matthew smiled, laughed even as he put on his jacket.

* * *

" _That smile..._ " Jessica thought as she broke away from her trance of the memory with a small, sad smile on her face.

Once her eyes settled in on the darkness around her, her smile faded. The warm feeling in her heart turned cold and her breathing became just as shallow. Her demons were coming back and she had no liquor to quash them. It wasn't very long before she thought about Matt again. The thought of it was tearing her from the inside out. The thought of him dead and laying at the bottom of that pit. It's like Matt kicked Kilgrave's ass and shoved him out of the way so he could haunt her. She didn't dare think of him like that. She knew he hadn't intended for anything that's happened to her...but it's happening.

 _"Should I have told him how I felt? Should I have tried to change his mind? Gave him a reason to come back? Or would I have just added a last minute burden to his already guilty, martyr mindset?"_

She couldn't bear the pain any longer. The emotional drawback of him was always so strong. Just like he was, but she couldn't take it anymore. She felt like she was sinking into a black hole the longer she lied in bed. She was losing it now. She sat up and grabbed the scarf again. Using it to wipe more of her tears away.

 _"Fucking asshole."_

Jessica got out of bed and headed for the refrigerator. She opened it, squinting as her eyes adjusted to light it shined. She let out a small sigh of relief when she spotted one last bottle of Cutty Sark. Relieved that she didn't have to make a liquor-run in the middle of the night, she took the entire bottle back to her bedroom. Once she got back to bed, she opened the cap easily and chugged three large gulps before letting the liquor burn the back of her throat.

She thought that maybe she would get through the night. Of course, she realized it was going to be another one of _those_ nights. Jessica placed the bottle on the nightstand and lied back down. This time she at least felt a little better after thinking happily about him, but the amount of guilt, depression and grief that possessed her would only increase tenfold.

So the tears started to fall again.

 _This time she let's them._

* * *

Ever since that night at the bar with Luke, she hadn't talked or even seen anyone else from the team. She figured distancing herself would be wise. She knows that a conversation with any of them was bound to turn into a conversation about Matt Murdock. She'd heard about Danny going around the city playing vigilante in Matt's place. Protecting it like he asked of them before he died. Luke was doing his part in Harlem. Jessica lived in Hell's Kitchen too. What was she doing to own up to it? Sulking and sitting in her own feelings? Sure, she was helping others in cracking her cases when desperate people came to her with all of these different scenarios, but she felt as if her work didn't make nearly as big an impact as either Luke or Danny's. After all, she was doing it because she needed the money to supply a roof over her head...and because she needed the goddamn liquor.

It was nearly Christmas time. A week and a half or so away from now.

 _"I guess time can really go by fast when you drink yourself to death every night."_

She rolled her eyes at herself as she walked through the hoard of people on the sidewalk while little fragments of snow embedded themselves into her hair and exposed skin. She felt a little speck land on her nose, but it melted at her warmth. At the boiling blood that resided in her veins. She was on her way to Trish's penthouse to eat dinner. She did promise her. She was probably drunk because she couldn't recall, but no matter the excuse, there was no way Trish was letting her get out of it now.

Jessica walked through the swarm of people with her mind on everything but the streets. As the light snow fell, she thought about him. She thought about Matthew. She thought about his crazy ninja senses. She started thinking of all the crap he'd start saying. About how he hears the slushy sound of the snow melting against her skin or guess exactly how cold it was just by being outside. He'd tell her wherever there was a patch of ice on the ground before they stepped in it. He'd smell and list all the ingredients that make up the fresh chicken soup boiling in the nearby kitchen for the homeless. Hell, the man could probably taste the air and know when it was going to stop snowing before it actually did. He could rest his hand on her cheek and feel the warmth. He could tell her he knows she's been crying.

As she walked across the street with the rest of the crowd, she looked up into the grey, emotionless, slush-colored sky. The sunlight just barely sinking through the fog. If Matt were right here walking next to her, he'd tell her the tear she let out just now melted half a centimeter into the snow it fell on. The spot was then stepped on by tens of other people, _crushing_ it. _Burying_ it in dirt and slush...forever.

* * *

Jessica sat on the couch in front of the TV with a beer and a plate full of mashed potatoes and a couple pork-chops while watching an episode of cheers. She mumbled something harsh when Trish put music on.

"Trish would you turn that crap off? For fucks sake it isn't even Christmas music."

Trish Walker sighed for a moment before replying. "Niall Horan isn't crap, Jess. Try listening to today's stuff, you might actually like it."

Jessica grunted as she stuffed her mouth with piece of pork. She listened to the words of the song and decided it wasn't so bad, but either way, she wasn't in the mood.

"It's this or Christmas carols, Jess," she added.

"I'd rather listen to a non-stop car alarm for the next twenty-five minutes."

Trish rolled her eyes and turned on the Christmas station. Maybe it wasn't a _horrible_ time for jingle bells. She got a plate full of her food of choice before sitting down next to Jess. Trish looked at her sister while she watched the TV. She saw the bags under her eyes...although those were always there. What she hadn't recognized before were the remnants of a red streak descending from her left eye.

"Jess, are you feeling alright?"

Jessica shifted her head in Trish's direction, cocking an eyebrow as she removed her full attention to Trish, knowing where this was going. She did not want to get into it right now, but knowing Trish, she was going to push her anyways.

"Yeah... yeah I'm good." Jessica blatantly lied to her, and she knows that Trish knows this. Trish met her gaze and shook her head. Jessica just took another sip from her bottle, trying to avoid conversation until she could think of a good subject to change it to.

"Jessica, please. You've been upset ever since Midland Circle..." Trish guessed what was wrong and remembered what'd happened that night, all of it quickly rushing back into her head. "Is this about Daredevil? Jessica I told you that you should talk about i-" but Jess cut her off.

"I don't want to talk about him." She replied with a tone that didn't seem very welcoming to any kind of prying at all.

"Look Jess," she began. She put her fork and plate down on the coffee table in front of them and moved closer to Jessica. Jess looked over and saw the concern in her eyes. Jessica felt her emotions running again and tried her best to hide them.

"It's just been a while and I'm worried about you. I know he meant something to you, but I got to see just a bit of what he was like when he saved us at the meeting and helped you escort me to the precinct. To be honest, I could see why you were attracted to the guy." She nudged Jess's side. Jess hid the only hint of a small half-smile under the rim of her beer bottle, but it could never overpower the grief. Nothing really did. It just stopped on its own. "I'm just saying that you didn't do anything wrong. He made his choice, Jess."

At that, she sighed because she's tried telling herself that so many times over the last month. "I can't get over how nice he was towards me. What he did and tried to do for me...and I treated him like crap half the time..."

"So? You're very guarded about your feelings. That's just who you are, Jess. You can't beat yourself up over tha-"

"There's so much more to it, Trish...you wouldn't understand." Jessica rubbed her eyes and shook her head almost violently, once more fighting the tears. Maybe Trish was right? Maybe it would be better to talk about it? Perhaps talking about it would prevent future emotional meltdowns.

"I don't need superpowers to know that you liked him, Jess."

"I did not..." she quietly denied.

"Did too." Trish gave her the "for crying out loud" attitude, knowing she was right. Jessica hated when Trish was right.

"I barely knew him, Trish. What makes you infer that I fucking liked him?"

Trish easily looked passed her denial and stared straight into her eyes, but she also took Jessica's hand in both of hers. "Because I saw everything. He was sweet and kind, funny. He made you smile, Jessica." Trish said, with a smile of her own tugging at her lips.

Jessica couldn't hold it back anymore, despite her efforts. Trish looked into her glistening eyes and pulled Jessica into a hug and held her gently. Jessica hated it when she cried. She wiped them away as soon as they fell from her eyes.

"I hate that he makes me cry, Trish. I hate it. I hate him even more for not being here..." Jessica stopped trying to bullshit the both of them and just came out with it. "I just wish I could have told him, Trish." She slowly pulled away from her. "I should have told him that I wanted him to be more. More than a friend…"

"Jessica, there was no guarantee that, even if you told him your true feelings, he would have come back. He sacrificed himself for this city, Jess, because he loved it."

Jessica turned to her, wiping the last tear away and hanging her head down in shame. Jess decided that she'd lost her appetite and placed her plate of food on the table next to Trish's. After a few seconds, Jessica looked back up at her with a more stern expression.

"Maybe if I had gotten him to love me, he would have come with me instead..."

Jessica couldn't deal with the emotions anymore. She knew Trish meant well, she always did, but Jessica couldn't go through with this any longer. The more she talked about it, the worse she felt.

"Trish, I'm sorry, but I-I have to go." Jessica stuttered as she got up and grabbed her coat before heading towards the door. Trish got up a second later and spun around to chase after her.

"Jessica, wait-"

Before she could finish her plea, the slam of the door interrupted her.

 _Jessica was already gone._

* * *

The next morning Jessica woke up to the sound of her alarm. This time it was her phone, however. She decided to start using it because she needed a cellphone and she couldn't really afford to buy a new one every time she broke her alarm clock. It forced her to actually wake up, despite the amount of liquor she downed the previous night. She turned on her side to reach for her phone. As quickly as she could, she unlocked it to stop the alarm.

She rubbed her eyes and picked the sleet out of them before going through new text messages. Eleven new messages. She started to scroll through them, seeing the great majority of them were from Trish. However, one of the newest ones sent at six in the morning was from...Danny Rand? Why on Earth had Danny decided to text her?

She opened up the little tab and read the message: "Hey, Jess. It's been a while. I haven't seen or heard from either you or Luke since that night at Midland Circle. Colleen is busy and Ward has everything handled at Rand today. I already asked Luke and he said he was going to be busy today also. I was wondering if you wanted to grab a bite for lunch..?"

She thought about it for a few moments. Of the entire team, she felt like she knew Danny the least out of the three of them. She wasn't sure whether or not it was a good idea. She felt like he'd bring up Matt, and it would just kill her appetite and then there wouldn't have been a point in going out in the first place. She still wasn't comfortable talking about him yet. It was going to be a while until she stopped thinking about all the lovely things she liked about the guy and the guilt that's harnessed her all this time.

She decided to leave Danny on read until she got ready for the day...however ready she could get, anyways. The first thing she did was get up and get naked before heading to the bathroom. She realized she hadn't showered in two days. She was letting herself go big-time. She took a long, hot shower. The hot beams of water felt nice against her back. She thought about Matt again, her pulse slightly quickening. The water encompassed her in its warmth. She pretended it was him holding her in his arms. Holding her with all of his essence. Like his life depended on it.

 _She was starting to think her life depended on it too._

She washed up fairly quickly and turned off the water. She stepped out and grabbed the towel she kept on the shelf to her right. Once she dried up, she slipped back into her regular attire before grabbing her phone and replying to Danny's request.

"Sure, Iron Clad," was all she had to say.

No less than a minute later he responded: "Really? Great! Although it's a little passed 12."

Jessica hadn't even paid attention to the time. It was two in the afternoon. Ten seconds later he sent another message: "Late lunch it is then. I'll let you pick the joint."

Jessica retorted with: "And you'll pay."

Danny replied with a sigh in his next line of dragged out letters: "Annnnd I'll pay."

Jessica smirked at this: "How about pizza at Sacco's?"

Danny: "Works for me. Meet you in an hour?"

Jessica: "Sure, Iron Clad. Let's have lunch."

She put down her phone and sighed. She was probably going to regret this. Making Danny suffer with her sarcastic jokes wasn't going to be as fun without Matt's soft chuckle of approval (or disproval) in the background.

She grabbed her flask and swallowed a large gulp as the saddest expression covered her face. She looked at the scarf she left wrapped up on the nightstand.

 _Matt..._

* * *

 **AN: Hello everyone! This is the first chapter. I hope you liked it, if you even made it this far...lol. By all means, I heavily encourage critique as this is the very first chapter of my very first rEaL story. I plan to update every other day. If I do manage to finish it otherwise, I will post as quickly as I can. As for chapter two, it will be from Matt's side of things. Chapter three is when I'll start merging both of the character's sides of things into one chapter and it will go from there. I can't wait to start banging this story out. Thanks for reading, and i'll see you next time.**

 **FYI, once my account on Archive Of Our Own is activated, I will also begin uploading the story there.**


	2. Born Again

**AN: Hello, everybody! Here's chapter two from Matt's perspective. Uploaded every other day as promised! Enjoy!**

* * *

The ominous, loud crack of thunder woke Matt from his everlasting daze of sleep. He wasn't aware of long he's been out, and he's not a hundred percent sure where he was or _how_ _the hell_ he was still alive? All he can remember is being with Elektra as Midland Circle Financial collapsed on the both of them. He then woke up in a convent...was it? He recognized the scents and smells from a lifetime ago. It was the orphanage. Saint Agnes orphanage...or so he thought.

Matt was trying to block out the outside calamity seeping into the church. He began trying to examine all of his injuries.

 _"They've done some work on me..."_ he thought.

 _"The broken rib is back where it belongs. I'm not bleeding,_ " he analyzed. He noted that just about every inch of his body was in pain. His whole body was littered in black and blues and soon-to be yellow bruises. The one other thing that shocked Matt is that he was buried in all of that rubble and debris, yet not one big chunk of it crushed any of his limbs. For that he was simply thankful and almost as shocked at the fact that he was still alive. How lucky really was he?

 _"I'm one big bruise. It's probably best not to pay attention to how I feel."_

The unexpected ringing of the bells from above made his ears writhe in pain. It wasn't the loudest pitch he's endured, but he could tell this was the first time he'd actually been awake for a long time and that his ears were not prepared for this high decibel of noise. He gritted his teeth in pain in an attempt to hold out just long enough. As he'd predicted, the noise soon subsided.

" _Bells?"_ he thought. He must have been in a church, not the orphanage, but why did it smell so familiar? He couldn't put his finger on it. The loud shriek of the bells, however, helped wake him. It helped clear his head, but just as much scrambled his radar sense. He tried not to focus on the outside surroundings. The first thing he smelt was a horrible scent. An unconscious drunken man in the alleyway two blocks away. Even his sweat smelt like cheap wine.

Most of the noise is muffled by the snowfall outside. The gulls. Those birds only sounded like that in the late afternoon. It's like the whole city was complaining. That's all the city was. A box of noise and affliction, but it helped him close in on his location.

" _I'm still in Manhattan, in the city,"_ he realized.

 _"Narrow it down, Matt."_ He tried to fight through the noise. Through the good and bad scents and sounds of the city. Rats and concrete dust...or was it just the room around him? He was _very_ disoriented.

" _I must be in a basement..?_ " He pondered for a moment until the strong stench of the alcohol flooded his nostrils again.

 _Jessica..._

The name came to his head in an instant. In all the drowsiness, he still thought about her. The outline of her body and face that his senses created. The sound of her voice...sometimes it was a little scratchy...but most of the time, it was melodic to his ears. He knew her footsteps better than he knew his own.

 _"Jessica Jones is truly beautiful..."_

He missed her. He wanted her here with him. To give him company as he recovered...he couldn't think of a better sweet. Jessica Jones was a sweetheart, not in the way you'd think or picture. She was emotional in her own way, and Matt could see it better than anyone.

Verbally, she uses sarcasm to be push people away. Physically, she just hits people when she's angry, or drunk. He knew she felt that need a lot. Emotionally, she doesn't let someone get close unless she knows she can trust them. Matt did remember the file on her. He read all about Kilgrave. What he did to her. What she eventually did to him. The deed was so bad and Zebediah was such an evil man, despite the fact that Matt was still healing and running on empty, he felt the anger close in around his heart. He clenched a fist until his knuckles were white.

 _"Who could do something like that to a person like Jessica and sleep at night?"_ he thought.

Just the idea of it filled him with a rage he'd only felt every now and then. Normally it was his demons, the rage that built up inside him during the night upon protecting Hell's Kitchen. This was different. This was a rage that coiled from the _heart_.

* * *

"It's simple. My dad abandoned us and got himself killed," the girl spat as she faced both Jessica and Matt. He and Jessica sat in the architect's family's brownstone with his daughter, trying to get any possible information about Midland Circle out of her.

"I know it's probably hard to understand-" Jessica began.

"Actually it's not." Lexi interrupted. Jessica paused for a moment before trying to speak to the young girl again, who was clearly upset about the situation with her father.

With a tired expression, Jessica tried again. "Your Dad didn't want to hurt you or your Mom."

"Yeah, well, she cries herself to sleep every night, so..."

Matt finally decided to speak up, "Lexi, did your dad have an office in the house?"

"No, he kept life and work separate. Some good that did him," Lexi retorted with a seemingly unforgiving choice of words towards her Dad.

Jessica frowned and looked at Matt who also wore a frown of his own. Jessica understood they both knew what it was that Lexi was going through, although she knew Matt suffered in a similar scenario. This was the moment she revealed to him what she'd figured out. That she remembered the incident from long ago, but had never traced it back to Matt Murdock until she saw the trophy engraving back at the apartment. She'd tell him what she thought about him and his background. Maybe even say she was sorry if she ever got around to it.

"You know, Lexi, you remind me of a friend of mine." She began, keeping her eyes on Matt for another moment before turning to Lexi with hopes she'd open up and be little more positive about cooperating with them.

"His dad was a boxer who got in way over his head and got himself killed. And for a long time, my friend thought his dad abandoned him, too." Jessica guessed. She didn't know Matt as much as she wished she did. He could tell by the tone in her voice at the mention of his father. It's like she _wanted_ his attention.

"Until one day, he learned the truth, that his dad was actually killed because he wanted to stop being a criminal, because he wanted his son to be proud of him," she continued, ending a breathy exhale.

"Whatever. I'm just saying that my friend's dad was a good guy, and maybe yours was too." She finished.

With that she looked back at Matt. She swallowed a gulp of air and her own saliva as she saw Matt's head slightly drooped downward at the ground. She could tell his mind was riveting with thought. She could see the emotion on his face, even with his glasses on. Matthew was a lot more easier to read without his mask on. It was then he realized he could trust Jessica Jones. That he could tell her more about himself...that he could tell her how he really felt.

* * *

Just then all the moments they had shared together began racing through his head.

 _"Jessica, how'd you know?"_

 _"Know what?"_

 _"About my Dad."_

 _"I don't read heartbeats, but I do read people."_

Matt thought about her voice. How it was always hoarse and how she was always stressed, _yet so_ _honest and caring._

 _"It just didn't seem important."_

 _"What aren't you telling us?"_

 _"I was with Elektra"_

 _"Why, do you know her?"_

 _"N-no..."_

Matt felt his heart ache as he lay in the bed. He had to move. He had to find her.

 _"Look, I've been down this road before, I know what we're up against."_

 _"I know who you are."_

 _"No you don't, trust me."_

 _"Yes I do, you're the Devil of Hell's Kitchen, or Devil Boy, or whatever it is you like to be called."_

 _"I know what happened with Kilgrave, so-"_

Matt pushed the top half of his body up with his arms, despite the pain coursing through him. As soon as he got his feet onto the floor he pushed himself up further, but his legs instantly buckled underneath him. Matt quickly reached for the bed behind him for a grappling point to break the fall. Matt couldn't get up. His legs felt numb, so he was still half on the bed and half not, although the socks on his feet were still slowly slipping on the polished hardwood floor.

"Okay," he asked himself.

 _"Who took the muscles out of my legs?"_

One of the nuns must have heard the commotion from outside because the door flew open just a few seconds later. Matt heard the sister let out a sympathetic sigh.

"You idiot," at that, Matt's eyes opened wide.

The nun approached him but he remained calm. She then circled behind him and slid her hands under his armpits. With all her strength, for Matt heard her internal grunting, helped him back onto the bed. As she positioned his legs back on the bed, she spoke again.

"My name is _Maggie._ You're staying here. You're hurt and you have a fever. Your wounds are not yet healed," she informed.

"You've probably used too much strength as it is...rest," she demanded of him. Matt was feeling tired, and his head began to hurt now that he was able to finally focus. He felt drowsiness begin to clutch at him. She didn't drug him or else he'd be able to tell. As Matt began to drift off while his head ablaze, her name rang in his head.

 _"Maggie..."_

* * *

Matt woke up no less than half an hour later, but his injuries hurt much more than they had the last time he was awake. He reached up and felt how warm his forehead was just as another hand grabbed his own and gently directed it back to where he had it resting while he was asleep. He hadn't realized it before, but he had a nasty scrape sewn together on his upper bicep, right under the broad of his shoulder.

Maggie is with him and by his side when the fever hits.

 _"I'm boiling alive,"_ he thought. _"Save for the cold, soft cloth Maggie gently dabs my forehead with."_

Matt tried hard to read his surroundings even with the killer headache. He heard the little trinket hang from her neck. A necklace made of gold. It was a cross. She gently lifted his head up and put the necklace around his neck as the cross lay on his chest.

When he first got his heightened senses, he went through a night of utter agony and pain. His senses were wild. Everything hurt. Every sound and smell. A woman came to him with words of hope and encouragement in knowing it would get better. She'd never tell him who she was, but he remembered one thing. He remembered that the woman wore a golden cross. He touched the cross with his own fingers. He never forgot what it felt like.

Matt felt the cross she'd put around his neck only a few moments ago. It was that very, same cross. This cross. He heard the nuns talking in the background as he scrambled through the thoughts jumbling up in his head.

"Still the fever climbs, sister," one of them spoke.

"It will break." Maggie replied with confidence.

"It will."

Matt knew he lost _a lot_ of blood. He knew he was sick, and he was gravely injured...but he didn't fear death. Every night he risked his life playing angel of the city. The demon of the citadel. He was Daredevil...and to think that illness was the way he'd go out was just ridiculous.

 _"My temperature..."_ he thought. _"It must be around a hundred and three now.._."

Everything felt groggy. He was beginning to pay attention to how he felt. He felt awful. He tried to think of something positive, something that would help him calm down...something relaxing. He thought about her-about Jessica. He felt like he was getting weaker, but she made him stronger. Before he drifted off because of the fever attacking his head, he stored Jessica in the vault of his head...or what he was ever able to make of her...

* * *

"You're right, this place is completely empty," Jessica commented as she, Matt and Luke walked through the halls of Midland Circle's basement floor.

"A lot of activity under the building now," Matt added as they came to a halt in the hallway. He unstrapped one of his gloves and rested his bare hand against the wall to their left. Matt then knocked on the wall with his fingers. He could hear it echoing through the air on the other side of the wall. He'd just found the ticket to hell.

Matt faced Luke for a second before returning his attention to the wall in front of him.

"I need you to...open this," he requested.

"Open what?" Luke asked.

"It's a door. Something mechanical behind it."

"What do you mean mechanical?" Jessica chimed in, but Matt didn't respond. He'd let her see what he meant once Luke finished busting down the hidden doorway.

The three of them studied the elevator behind the wall and then directed their attention to the hole it would descend into if activated.

"How deep does this go?" Luke asked.

Matt tried to listen as far as his radar would go, but he couldn't give a solid answer.

"Hard to tell," he responded.

"The more I think about it, the less I like our odds," Luke admitted.

"Yeah, well, do like me. Don't think about it," Matt shot back as he refastened his glove back on.

"If you told me a week ago that I'd be here with you two...about to blow up some building and fight ninjas to save New York..."

"Yeah..." Luke chuckled.

She sighed.

"For whatever it's worth," Matt began, "I'm glad you're here."

Matt could tell that the both of them were staring at him with puzzled looks.

"What?" she queried.

"I mean, circumstances could be better, I'm just saying, you know, I'm glad we found each other," he admitted.

"I'm not hugging you," Matt looked down with an awkward smile as well with a look of misunderstanding.

He meant it for the both of them. For all four of them, even Danny, but he meant it the most towards her. Throughout all of his relationships with Claire, Elektra, and Karen, he realized one simple thing. They all wanted him to be something he's _not_. Within the little amount of time he spent with Jessica Jones, he noticed that they got along because of their abilities and their pasts. She treated him as an equal.

Matt could tell Jessica cared for him in a way she didn't care for most. She was usually rude and dismissive to people she didn't trust. Matt also knew that. He took into account where, at the beginning, she was rude to him...because she didn't _trust_ him. She became much more kind and caring towards him after they both agreed that they trusted each other.

Matt Murdock realized he found someone who understood him. Who accepted him for who he was because she wasn't much different. He also knew he could never reveal to Jessica how she made him feel. There was no worse time to tell Jessica Jones something like that while in the middle of fighting the Hand.

He knew that he had already made up his mind in terms of what he was going to do when they rescued Danny. He was going to save Elektra no matter what, even if it cost him his life. He had to push Jessica out of his mind and make Elektra his priority. There was no use in telling her something like that when no less then an hour later he could potentially be a dead man.

The Devil of Hell's Kitchen found love where he wasn't supposed to.

 _Right in front of him..._

* * *

 _"Everyone has a unique heartbeat with their own patterns and sounds. Everyone's heart quickens and slows at things that another's heart may not even react to. Everyone's heart is different. A single heartbeat can tell you a lot."_

 _"Mine, for example, has slowed considerably in the past few hours...ever since the fever broke. It's a pleasure just to sit and listen to it."_

Matt sat in bed wide awake now, perfectly aware of his surroundings and the people in the room with him.

"God has been merciful to that boy," one of the sisters began.

"God is just, sister," Maggie responded.

Maggie's heart is just to his right. It's in great shape. She's got a lot of years of left. The tension dissipated from her through her sweat. Matt could tell, she seemed much more relaxed than she was only a day ago.

 _"She has the same scent she brought to my hospital room all those years ago,"_ Matthew thought as he studied sister Maggie's random attributes.

"Are you hungry?" She asked.

Matt could feel that his stomach was still slightly upset. He didn't have much of an appetite at the moment. He knew he had not eaten for quite some time. He's been in a coma for the last month and a half, after all.

"Not yet, but I will be, thanks to you," he blessed.

Maggie approached the bed and helped tuck Matt back in under his blanket.

"Give your thanks to the lord," she politely advised.

Her scent is a pleasant one. It's relaxing...yet it seemed so much like his own.

"Maggie..." he said her name and paused a moment before finishing his question.

 _"Who could love me so much...and stay away for so long?"_ The question started to boggle his mind.

" _Who are you, Maggie?"_

Matt hadn't known his Mother for very long. He didn't have much memory of her either. Only bits and pieces of memories that would take a lifetime to unravel...which he obviously didn't have time for. He remembered his father telling him that she was a very religious woman. She was much more of Catholic than Battlin' Jack himself ever was. His father probably thought that making Matt into the devout Catholic he was today was his own way of doing right by her, even after she left them.

"Was it possible?" He thought. Under the current circumstances and all the memories and hints he was told about his Mother. With connection of the golden cross necklace, it all seemed to add up rather profoundly.

 _"_ Are you my mother..?" Matt finally concluded.

"Of course not, child," she answered with a smile. Her tone calm, yet stern at his question.

 _"A heartbeat can tell you a lot..."_ Matt thought again.

 _"Hers just jumped..."_

 _"She's lying."_

 _"Why would she lie?"_ he asked himself. "Why did you lie?" Sister Maggie turned to him, startled.

"W-what do you mean, child?" She denied him.

"I heard your heartbeat. It jumped when I asked you..." he admitted.

"I-I don't know what you're talking about?" She stuttered her remark.

"A person's heartbeat spikes when he or she is lying. It's how I can tell..."

"You-you can hear that?" Sister Maggie asked, sounding rather shocked.

"Results of the accident..." he finalized.

Maggie knew she could not get out of this. Matt Murdock was her son. She hoped he wouldn't ever find out but somehow he did. She didn't see a point in lying anymore.

"Jack never told you, did he?" she began.

"Of course he didn't. He loved you too much. We both did..." She let a long moment of silence fill the room before continuing.

"You were the most beautiful baby boy, Matthew, so perfect," she emphasized. He could sense the hint of a smile forming on her mouth, but it quickly faded as she continued telling the story.

"Not me nor your father had close family, and with him on the road so often...I felt alone and scared right from the start. It only grew worse over time. I was constantly anxious and would go weeks without a minute's sleep..."

Matt didn't really know what to say or how to react to her story? He simply kept listening to the soothing pitch of Maggie's voice, yet he listened intently to what she had to say. This was his Mother, after all.

"Back then, doctors didn't understand postpartum depression. They waved it off as "Baby Blues." In a lot of women, it is very real, Matthew. It's not a funk, it's an illness."

Matt could hear the long-kept pain and sadness in her voice. She'd kept the guilt bottled up all these years. How someone was able to last so long with a burden like that, he had no idea? Maybe he got a little bit of his will to move on from both of his parents? He could feel the sorrow in her tone as she explained herself for leaving all those years ago. She wrapped one of his hands in both of her own and caressed it.

"I wasn't ready to be a wife or a mother. I wasn't confident in myself as a mother. The more your father tried to reassure me, the more frightened I became. I then left you and your Dad to commit my life to Christ...I'm not proud of it, Matthew."

A single tear dropped from Maggie's eye as she gripped Matt's hand tighter.

"I'm sorry, Matthew..."

Matt felt the overall exhaustion of the day creeping in on him more heavily now. It was a long day and Matt could tell it was late in the night because the city outside was much more quiet than it had been throughout the day. He felt himself drifting off in dire need of rest. Mother and son needed rest after these long, painful, agonizing years of being separated and lost.

 _"I forgive you, Mother..."_

* * *

Matt stayed at the Church for an entire week after the night Maggie admitted she was his Mother. Throughout the week, they'd talked a lot about Battlin' Jack, and of course, he further explained to Maggie how he could hear her heartbeat. For the first time in nearly thirty years of his life, Matt Murdock was finally got to know his long-lost mother.

She was a sweet, gentle woman. Insecure, no doubt, but a gift from God nonetheless.

In the past week, for as often as he could, Matt isolated himself from the rest of the Church when in his meditation trances. With the mystical ninja training of the Chaste taught to him by Stick, meditating accelerated his body's healing processes. He was still bruised here and there with scrapes residing mostly on his torso area. He wasn't completely healed, but he was strong enough to stay on his feet. To move on. To fight if he really had to. It was just enough.

Matt also took the last week as time to organize a plan to get his life back. He still didn't know exactly how he was going to explain to everyone that he didn't actually die at Midland Circle? Explain how Elektra must have also survived the explosion and dragged him out of the hole and that he woke up from unconsciousness in a church where nuns cared for him in his recovery. For the time being, he was going to leave the part about his Mother out.

He didn't want to put Maggie in danger. The less people that knew about her, the better off she was. It was best if he kept it to himself. Perhaps he'd tell Father Lantom? As Matt thought about the priest, he noticed that it would be wise to seek Father Lantom for advice on how to carryout his plan in getting his life back before revealing himself to anyone else.

Matt stood before the exit of the church in clothes that the nuns supplied him with. Blue jeans, work boots, a dark grey hoodie, a blue winter coat, a baseball cap, a pair of sunglasses and gloves. He asked for the glasses in case he ran into someone he didn't want to reveal himself to. The beard he grew in his time at the church also helped disguise his face a bit better. He just hoped he didn't run into any of his former teammates. Luke, Danny, Jessica...

 _"Jessica,"_ he thought. Matt didn't know how he was going to reveal himself to Jessica Jones? As much as he thought he knew her, and depending on the amount of alcohol she'd ingested before he did so, she was still unpredictable to him. She might be the one who actually puts him ten feet under.

Luke and Danny were going to be easier to explain to. A lot of explaining they'd want, sure, but he felt a connection with them where he knew he could trust them to keep his secret a secret and not put his "supposed to be dead ass" in the ground. When the time came, he'd decide who to tell first. Right now, he already had an order of people he was going to tell first. Father Lantom, Melvin Potter, then Foggy.

His reasoning for putting Melvin before Foggy was because if he got what he needed from Melvin first, it would make everything a lot easier. He also needed new Daredevil gear. He knew he could trust Melvin to keep his arrival quiet. Foggy could potentially tell Karen, and from there it could get out of hand. He knew Foggy was tired of keeping secrets which is why Matt wanted to get this one out there as soon, but also as safely and rationally as he possibly could.

As Matt zippered up the blue jacket, he heard a set of footsteps coming from behind him. Slow steps...gentle steps.

"Do you really have to leave so soon, Matthew? You aren't fully healed yet," Maggie pleaded.

"I have to, Mother. I need to get my life back, and set a few things straight with a _lot_ of other people. It's been too long since my "death." If I stay in the shadows any longer I may not be forgiven by those that I need the most in my life," he answered.

Maggie's head dropped in slight disapproval. She knew Matthew was as stubborn and brave as his Father was.

"You're just like him, Matthew," she smiled. She approached him and embraced Matt in a hug. "He'd be so proud of you, son."

Matt kept silent and wrapped his arms around his Mother to complete the hug that she offered.

"Remember, Matthew, you'll always have the lord's forgiveness."

After another minute, she pulled away and took her necklace off and held the golden cross out to him.

"Here, take it," she beckoned him.

"Mother I can't-"

"Take it...please," Maggie insisted.

After a moment of both thought and hesitation, Matt slowly grabbed the necklace from her hand and put it around his neck.

"Now I'll always be with you, my son." Maggie leaned in and gave him a quick peck on the cheek. Matt tucked the necklace into his hoodie and put his hat on.

"Be warm, Matthew, and be safe," she asked.

"I will, Mother. One day I will return. I promise."

He pulled the door open and walked onto the snowy pavement. The cold air slapping him in the face instantly. Before he descended down the rest of the stairs, he turned back to Maggie for one more time.

"Thank you, for everything."

At that, he continued his way down the stone steps until he reached the sidewalk and proceeded his walk back home. Sister Maggie watched him walk until his form disappeared into the darkness of the night and the fog of the snowfall.

"Please be careful, my child. May God guide you in your travels home," she prayed sincerely with a hint of worry in her voice before stepping back into the church and locking the doors behind her for the night. She knew he would hear her wishes.

"I will, Mother. I will," he spoke aloud.

As he walked further down the road, he listened to her heartbeat. And he would focus on it and nothing else until it was finally out of his ear's range.

 _It was time to go home..._

* * *

 **AN: And here it must end, sadly. I know. I'm the goddamn author and I already want more. I've already got it all planned out, and will be uploaded hopefully by Saturday! Chapter 3 is when I plan to start merging both Jessica and Matt's perspectives of the story until eventually, in an order of events, they will collide. You ever write a story and have to resist so hard from rushing through the prologue and rising action just so you can write about the couple you so desperately want to see together? Yeah, I suffer from this. If anybody has a name for it, please tell me. Anyways, till next time and I hope you enjoyed.**


	3. To Make Her Happy

Danny was now over ten minutes late. Of course he was going to be late. Usually the people that propose the offer are the ones late too it. This didn't surprise Jessica. She stood outside the pizza parlor in her regular attire, save for the change into a grey undershirt. She wore a plain black beanie with a pom on top. It was freezing outside. The only reason she was standing out here is because she was waiting for Danny.

And he was paying for the meal.

 _"Fucking Danny,"_ she thought.

"Where the hell are you, Rand?" She mumbled aloud. Jessica pulled her flask from her jacket pocket and took a couple swigs of it as a black limousine pulled up next to the sidealk. The vehicle nearly blocked the entire entrance to the parlor.

"You've got to be shitting me." Jessica scoffed and rolled her eyes as Danny exited the limousine. He turned back, thanked the driver and watched it drive off for a second before turning in her direction. He was wearing a full, dark grey business suit under a darker winter coat. It reminded her of the way Matt dressed when out of the Daredevil costume.

Jessica pushed the thought out of her head and put the flask back in her coat pocket as Danny approached.

"Seriously?" She asked with a touch of annoyance.

"What?" He asked, confused at how she was speaking to him. He guess he did call on short notice. He hasn't talked to her in a little over a month and a half...or Luke, for that matter. Maybe she had a lot on her mind? He hoped that she'd want to catch up which was mainly the reason he invited her out for lunch.

"You really had to drive to a pizza parlor on second and thirty-fourth avenue in a limousine?"

Danny chuckled, "Nice to see you too, Jess. You haven't changed a bit, I see."

As the two walked into the parlor, the scent of fresh brick oven-baked pizza wafted into their faces.

"You ever been here before?" Danny asked.

"Nope, but I've been meaning to. Haven't really had the time..." she answered.

 _"Or the appetite._ " She thought.

She and Danny spent about fifteen seconds finding an open table. They sat down at a table towards the back of the parlor and to the left of them was a large window, providing them a view of the street through the front of the joint. Their waiter arrived at the table only a few minutes later with a notebook in her hands. They quickly decided on a simple order for a small, pepperoni pizza. They didn't want to get anything fancy in case the place totally sucked. Danny ordered a plain black coffee and Jessica took a coffee as well with cream and extra sugar.

Jessica examined the type of people the restaurant drew in for customers. Normal people, families. Maybe a few weirdos in the bar section, but nothing that was going to annoy her. She then turned to Danny and saw him fiddling with his wrist watch. She saw the uncomfortable look on his face. It was clear to her he didn't exactly know how to start. She didn't blame him, because she didn't know what to say either. It was quiet between them at first, and kept quiet until their coffees arrived. Once the waiter left, Jessica swiftly took the her flask out and poured some MaCallens into her coffee.

Danny raised an eyebrow in slight uncertainty as she did so. He just took a sip from his own coffee.

"This right here, this is a coffee that'll wake you up." She explained herself as she put the cup up to her mouth and swallowed a gulp.

"How do you drink that plain, black shit? It's awful." She stated.

"In K'un-L'un, they gave us much more...odd tasting meals, Jess. This is nothing at all. Besides, I like it the most like this." He answered.

"K'un-what?" She pardoned, shaking her head.

"K'un'-L'un." He repeated.

Jessica rolled her eyes at him and sighed. It got quiet between the two of them again.

"How've you been, Jessica. Since Midland Circle...well, since we were last all together?" He asked.

She could hear the curiosity in his tone.

"I've been...alright. Been working cases all around Hell's Kitchen. I even got a few clients from Chinatown over the last couple of weeks." She answered rather honestly. Leaving out the part where she drank herself to sleep every night because of her pent up guilt for the death of Matt...and because she missed him.

"Well, that's good. I'm glad to see your business is getting a little more recognized around Manhattan. You deserve it, Jess." He admitted, taking another sip out of his coffee mug.

Jessica shrugged at his words. "And you?"

Danny didn't know how to answer at first? His life had been exceptionally bland since that night at Midland Circle. He'd only been trying to discover Joy Meachum's current whereabouts. He'd been helping Colleen train her students as well as helping Ward run Rand Enterprises. He was also fulfilling Matt's wishes and using his martial arts skills to protect the city at night when it was needed most. He knew this was how Matt had done it in his time as Daredevil.

"Other than the late night patrols, I've been running around everywhere and getting nowhere fast." He snickered. He took another sip from his cup. "Heard from Luke at all?"

"Eh...I haven't really talked to anyone we were involved with since after Midland Circle. Not Luke, not Misty, not Claire, not anyone. Just been worrying about my own shit. Last time I talked with Luke was the night after Midland Circle. We met at a bar and just talked everything out." She told him. She chugged a good portion of the coffee in her mug, focusing on the slight burn it left in the back of her throat because of the scotch she added to it.

"What was it about? Your conversation, I mean?" He asked.

At first she wanted to tell him it was none of his goddamn business, but decided to watch how rude she was. She knew Danny had a temper. She remembered how he tried to fight the entire group because they wouldn't let him leave, as opposed to just trying to make a plan that would kept him much safer. Not that he needed it, but with him being the key to what the Hand was striving for, it wasn't a risk they could take.

"About the entire week fighting the Hand. About the final night at Midland Circle...about-" she cut herself off, looking down at the table for a moment with her hands folded. She felt her emotions begin to constrict her, but she knew it was slowly getting easier for her to talk about him.

"About what?" he asked, noticing her pause in the middle of her sentence.

"About Matt, Danny. About Matt." She choked out his name like a sore in the back of her throat as it came out of her mouth. She just shook her head and let out another long sigh as she looked back up at him. She saw the frown form at his mouth as he removed the cup from it at the mention of his name.

"I miss him too, Jessica. Every time I'm out there fighting the good fight," he began, "his fight...I think about him. The sacrifice he made for the city. For us." Danny explained. "He was a good man, Jessica, and an even better friend. Our friend" He eulogized.

"Yeah..." she agreed, as if to make it look like she didn't have much to say. Other than Trish, she didn't want anyone else to know how she was coping with Matt's death.

Danny knew not to try and read Jessica Jones. If she caught him randomly staring at her, she'd probably freak out on him. Besides, reading people was her job, but it didn't change the fact that he saw the look of sorrow materialize from her facial features. He knew Jessica and Matt had become friends over the course of their time together. Danny himself held a great deal of respect for Matt. He could see that she was still sensitive about the topic. Losing a teammate is difficult, he understood that.

Just then their pizza arrived. The waiter left them the pan of pizza and nodded before walking away to serve other customers. At the same time, the two of them went for the pizza. Danny let her pick a piece first before he dived in. They both were silent as they each took a bite out their slices.

"It's not so bad..." Danny took another bite.

"I mean...it's not awful..." Jessica shrugged.

A man who sported all black clothing, a cap, combat boots, and an earpiece silently watched the two defenders as they ate their meal.

"I have a visual, Mr. Fisk."

"Engage only if necessary."

"Yes, sir." With that, the man got up to leave the parlor.

As Jessica and Danny finished their small, four piece pizza, Danny paid the bill of fifteen dollars and let the waiter keep the change of for a tip. As the man in black approached the door, Danny caught him observing the both of them before speed walking out of the restaurant. Danny got up in a hurry and looked out the window to see what direction the man took off in.

"Danny, what the hell?!" Jessica exclaimed. "What is it?"

"A man, he was spying on us. Dressed like a hitman, he just left parlor." Danny, not caring if he made a scene, rushed out of the building, Jessica following suite. As they got onto the sidewalk, Danny looked to his left and saw the man walk into an alleyway two buildings down.

"This way!" he called out as he and Jess sprinted towards the alleyway. As they turned into the alley, they saw the man look in their direction as he hurriedly climbed a fire escape to get to roof level. Danny, wasting no time, chased after him and began to climb the fire escape. Jessica sighed and used her jumping ability to meet the both of them up there. As soon as the agent got to the rooftop, the collar of his shirt met a pair fingerless gloves. She was holding him with all of her might crushing the collar on his jacket.

"What the hell do you want?" Jessica spoke in a tone that implied it wasn't as much a question as it was a demand. The man struggled in her grip. A few seconds later, Danny arrived onto the roof. He looked at the man, but then looked at Jessica in utter surprise.

"How the hell did you get up here so fast?"

"Story for another time, Iron Clad."

"No, really, how?"

The man pulled a gun on Jessica. Danny in his fastest reaction time, pushed the both of them to the ground causing the hitman's bullet to skin Jessica's leather jacket, not harming her actual arm. The man punched Jessica across the face with a small spike on the middle knuckle of the glove he wore, leaving a scrape across her cheek. She only slightly grunted in pain, but the man used both of his feet to kick her away, completely loosening her grip on him. He got up and immediately tried to run, but Danny flipped in front of him and delivered a hard right cross to his jaw.

He stumbled back in pain. The hitman knew of the immortal Iron Fist. He knew his hand-to-hand skills were simply outmatched. He wasn't going to beat them, he was out-numbered and overpowered, so he only had the option of escaping. Jessica got up and stood next to Danny and they both began to rush the man. While they were distracted, the hitman took the split second opportunity and put his escape plan into practice. Danny was the first to notice the grenade and out an arm in front of the Jessica to hold her back.

They both looked back to the man who had a grin on his face. "You two might wanna cover up." With that, he jumped onto the next roof and proceeded to gain distance between himself and the two defenders as he made his way back to his headquarters.

"Jessica, cover your ears and close your ey-!" Danny tried to shout, but was interrupted by the detonation of the flash-bang grenade. Jessica fell to the ground, stunned and disoriented as she didn't heed his instructions before it was too late. Her ears rang and the flash impaired her vision to the point of blurriness. She looked over and saw Danny's form squirming on the ground. Jessica held her head in pain as ringing began to shockwave through her brain. It hurt.

 _"How could you ever put up with this kind of stuff, Matt?"_ She thought to herself as she realized she was temporarily blind. She shook her head, but it only created a major headache. She felt like whenever she moved her head, her brain hit the inside of her skull in that direction. After a few minutes, the pain subsided as well as the blurriness. She stood up, the ringing still flowing through her head. She looked at Danny and saw that he was already off the ground and on his own feet.

"You alright?" He asked.

"Never better..." She grunted.

They stood silent on the rooftop for a few minutes, Danny still trying to find the man somewhere in the distance, but to no avail.

"Who do you think he could have been?" She asked.

"I've not the slightest idea..?" He answered back. "More importantly...who could he be working for?" He added. The both of them shrugged, not knowing exactly what to do about the situation.

"I'm guessing we _weren't_ ready for that..?" She finally added, wiping the blood off her cheek. Danny just looked to her and said nothing, panting heavily as he rested his hands on his knees.

* * *

It was nearly six in the morning and the sun had already been up for roughly half an hour. Matt walked up and down the streets of Hell's Kitchen again, but this time not as the blind lawyer. He ha no suit, no cane. He walked as if he were a regularly sighted person. It felt nice to be home after all that time of not being in Hell's Kitchen. He discovered that his Mother's church was all the way in SoHo, where he came from. He was able to take the subway from there to Hell's Kitchen as of last night. He left the church around five in the morning. The earlier the better was his opinion of the matter.

He smelt Buono's fresh bread out of the oven at the Italian bakery between fourth and fifty-sixth street. It never failed to hunger him, but he didn't have any cash on him. As he walked through his home's streets and the light snowfall, he listened to everything. It was always nice at this time, where there wasn't much commotion to block out. These were the times when he could actually listen to the city speaking to him. He could hear its calls through the wind. He could smell the stench it let off, crying in pain at all hr crime and murder being done within its boundaries. Hell's Kitchen needed it's Daredevil more than ever.

Matt was close to Father Lantom's church by now. He knew Father Lantom always went in early, especially on Sundays. Despite the size of the of the building and its current location, it got quite the crowd for Sunday morning mass when it came time. Matt had some time to talk with Father Lantom beforehand. As he started up the smoothly paved walkway, he listened to the entire church, only hearing one heartbeat. Matt reached the door and rested his hand on the bar for a moment. As he opened the door, a slight smile tugged at his face. Even though he still had to return to his life as Matt Murdock, he knew Father Lantom would make it just a little bit easier.

As Matt entered the church, he was instantly hit with a wave of heat. Father Lantom must have had the heat up in the low seventies. The artificial warmth wrapped itself around Matt's cold clothing and his face as he walked down the aisle. He could sense Father Lantom in the back. He must have been doing work in the back office. Matt walked up to the door and knocked.

"Father?" he called from the other side of the door. After a few seconds, Father Lantom opened the door.

"May I help you, sir?" he asked.

Matt took off the cap and glasses he currently donned.

"It's, Matt, father. Matthew Murdock..."

The priest's eyes opened widely. Shocked if anything. The man opened the door more and stepped out to speak to his visitor. "I thought the papers," he began, "they said you died the night that building on second and fourth collapsed."

Matt looked away for a moment, letting his head drop for a moment.

"I know for a fact that a body was never found. If anything, the newspapers labeled me as 'missing.' I knew everyone involved, Father. I know they never would have revealed to the public what really happened." A slight ounce of shame fell upon his face as he spoke to the friar. "Maybe the Devil of Hell's Kitchen was killed, but not Matt Murdock. You're the first to know, Father...and until I can be sure of what I'm going to do about it, I'd like it to stay that way." He confessed.

Father Lantom was still shocked, but he kept his composure. "Do you want to talk about it, Matthew?" He offered.

"That's actually what I came here for, Father." He answered.

Father Lantom spent another minute wrapping up the work he had been occupied with before Matthew arrived. After a few more seconds, he lead Matthew to the confession booth where they both took seats on opposite sides of the wall that divided them.

"Where have you been all this time?" Father Lantom started.

"After being buried in the rubble of Midland Circle, I was unconscious for and a half, roughly." Matt revealed. "I think the person I was down there with survived and dragged me out. The next thing I know Father, I woke up in a church in SoHo."

"St. Kevin's?" He queried.

"Possibly?"

"I've been up there a few times. We usually gathered all of our materials together for the annual canned food run." Father Lantom told. "Did you happen to meet any of the sisters who run the church?"

"Sister Maggie..."

"Maggie? I knew her...she was very distant at first, but even she had come to me for confession when I was around. She was much less confident in the past, and like you, Matthew, questioned a lot of her decisions. Over time she'd gotten better with her self-esteem. It wasn't very hard to see it in her."

Matt took in what Father had to say about her. Father Lantom probably knew his own mother better than he did, but he knew enough about his mother to understand the truth in Lantom's words. "That's why I'be been gone for so long. She and the other sisters nursed me back to health. I was both sick and gravely injured. Even now, all of my concussions are not yet healed."

He paused for a moment as he decided to tell Father Lantom that Sister Maggie was his mother.

"Father..." he began. "What do you think of someone who was supposed to play an important role in your life, but left in an early stage of your life because they feared they could not give you everything you deserved or needed from them?" Matt questioned him.

It took Father Lantom an actual minute to think of something to say, but he eventually found the words he was looking for. "The only thing they changed by doing so is who you are or were going to be as a person. One's reasoning isn't always just, but it is important that you try to understand their intentions, Matthew."

"Sister Maggie is my mother, Father." Matt acknowledged. He heard a slight jump in Father Lantom's heartbeat. He could tell it came as a bit of a shock to Father Lantom, having known Sister Maggie and all.

"She left my Father and I when I was at young age. My dad, as you know, was boxer. That usually meant he was up and about most of the time. On the road. Maggie told me that she'd suffered from postpartum depression and that she was not ready to be a wife or a mother. She took off to become a sister and dedicate her own life to the Lord." Matt informed the priest.

"There are worst things she could have become...thank the lord that he guided her in his direction." Father Lantom. "And how do you feel about it, Matthew?"

"At first I was angry at her...however that was before I met her. After she told me what really happened, I understood why she did it. I knew my Dad just as well as she did."

"Did you forgive her, Matthew? After she apologized."

"I did, Father. After talking to her, I realized there's no one else on this planet who needed forgiveness more than she did."

"That's good, Matthew. She know can live her life in God's eyes without feeling as if they burn in the back of her head for hiding a sin all her life..."

After that, it had gotten quiet once more. Matthew didn't really know what to say anymore, however he felt better about his mother. She was a good woman, and he was happy that Father Lantom knew that personally.

"When Daredevil died, he left a team of friends behind. Daredevil stayed behind to try and save someone who was already gone, as well as ensure his team's safety to the surface. Was it wrong to play martyr? Was it wrong to let them think that they had failed me? Left them thinking that they could have somehow saved me?"

"How do you know they blame themselves for your death?" He questioned. "You were doing the right thing, Matthew. Your religion did not play a part in your choice. You decided to do what you thought was right and for the better of your friends. Regardless of what other excuses your mind may come up with, Daredevil died making sure they could escape safely." Father Lantom observed, helping Matt understand more than one side of his decision.

"You can't possibly think martyrdom had anything to do with what you were thinking at the time. Your belief in Catholicism is not what got Daredevil killed. It was the decision you made to stay behind with the person you attempted to save...and look where you are now, Matthew. Whatever it is that happened, and whoever this person was...they saved you."

Matt thought about his words. Matthew was almost certain that Elektra had dragged him out of the whole. There was nothing else that could have happened. Above all, Father Lantom was right.

"Your friends may be mad at you at first if you decide to reveal yourself, but sooner or later, they will forgive you as you have forgiven yourself. Once they understand what you based your decision on, they'll pull through for you. That's what friends do, Matthew."

Matt only nodded in response. Matthew knew what he was going to do now. As he was about to speak for himself to leave, Father Lantom asked him another question.

"Now...what is it that you plan to do with your...other life, Matthew?"

"That's what I wanted to talk about also, Father." He'd forgotten.

"It would look suspicious that Daredevil and the blind lawyer disappeared at the same time...and are now returning at the same time. I've been thinking about...possibly putting that life away once more."

"The return of Matthew Murdock does not have to make the papers, son." Father revealed. He was right bout that as well. "Regardless, the return of Daredevil will. If that is the path you choose to retake upon arriving home."

"Do you think Daredevil _should_ return along with Matt Murdock?"

"Matthew, haven't you already tried giving it up before? We've had these talks enough times for me to know that as long as you are able, you will fight to protect the innocent. You've told me that you try so hard to resist dressing up to defend those who need it most. When the city is calling for your help, it does not mean that it is trying to punish Daredevil for giving up. It is encouraging him to do what's right." Father Lantom assured him.

"And what is the right in that, Father?"

"That what you do for the city is not a sin in God's eyes, Matthew. It is _how_ you do it that can potentially make it a sin." He answered. "The Lord believes that eventually, you will understand. As do I. Through all of your struggles and hardships, with of all of your losses and mistakes. They should give you reason to keep going. That to do right by the people you love and those _you_ have lost-to do right by your home, Matthew. That sometimes, to do the work of _angels_ in plain sight...it is necessary to take the guise of a _demon_." Father Lantom pushed him. In a motivational way, which is exactly what Matt thought he needed.

Matthew's mind was made up with the help of Father Lantom's words. The Father was right. Matt felt confident in how he was going to execute his return. He for sure knew what he had to do...that Daredevil was the one who had to return for Hell's Kitchen. That Daredevil was the only one who sought redemption for his time away. That Matthew Murdock owed no one, except his friends. Matthew knew the path he would take, and that it was the best one.

"Thank you, Father." Matt spoke, finally.

"It's good to see you, Matthew." With that, Matthew proceeded to exit the booth. As he got to the entrance of the church, Matt put his cap and shades back on.

"Matthew." Father Lantom called out. Matt turned around as he began opening the door.

"Yes, Father?" He called back.

"I'm glad to know you're back."

Matt stood still for a moment, not really knowing what to say. He nodded in Father Lantom's direction.

"Thanks again, Father."

Matt exited the church and waved goodbye to the priest before walking through the walkway and back onto the sidewalk. The cold air almost stung his face with such sudden change in temperature. As he continued down the sidewalk, he put his hands in his coat pockets and crossed the street. Next stop was Melvin Potter's workshop.

* * *

After lunch and the encounter with the mysterious hitman, Jessica and Danny decided to split up, as well as the fact they both had shit to do afterwards. Jessica went home for an hour and let head recover from the explosion of the flash grenade. Now she was out on the streets working a case. She was hired by some rich guy with the name of Steven Grant to spy on a group of former business partners who had supposedly been using him and his money to their advantage in funding weapons for a gang of criminals.

He hired her to find both proof and the leader of this gang and get him to back off with the weapons deal he had struck with his ex-business partners so he could have them dealt with "legally." Jessica knew he said it in a suspicious tone of voice, but she ignored it and decided she didn't really give a shit, just as long as she got the money. **(** **AN: Yes I just referenced Moon Knight, because why not?)**

The thing Jessica could never ignore were her walks passed Matt's apartment building during her walks through the city. It would always make her think about the one time he brought her to his loft. It reminded her her of all the memories she'd made with him. It wasn't much, the time they had together, but she thought about it often. She thought about Matt in general. She wanted to make more of those memories. She realized that even if he was alive, she wouldn't have quite known how to tell him anyways. So every time she walked passed the building, she did her best to ignore it.

Jessica found it difficult to ignore it this time around. Thinking about Matt made her both sad and, well...happy. She'd realized he helped her discover who she was underneath the drunk, smart ass detective because she hadn't felt that way about anyone in a long time, besides Luke, who was happy with Claire, so she pushed him out of the realm of possibility. The thing that pained her most when thinking about Matt the fact that he had her back right from the start, even when they weren't exactly friends, he was still trying to defend her. From the interrogation room, to Midland Circle, to Murakami, he was there for her.

He'd saved her life once, but when he needed her most, she just let him go. She didn't even try to make him change his mind. She just wanted to get back up to the surface. No matter the amount of lives Jessica saved by taking down the Hand, she could never get over the one they lost to the fight.

As Jessica walked in front of the building, she looked up at Matt's level.

"As dull as it ever was." She shook her head.

Once she got into the nearby alleyway, she looked to her left and right to make sure nobody was watching her from either direction. She looked upwards and leaped to the top of the apartment building. When Jessica landed, she slightly lost balance on the gravelly rooftop. She still hadn't gotten the hang of it, but she could tell she was getting better at it.

She approached the door to his apartment. She remembered the rooftop access. She remembered they'd used it to get in that one time since he was in his Daredevil uniform. It's not like he could have just used the elevators or walked through the lobby. Matt really was smarter than he looked.

She wriggled the doorknob, and of course, it was locked. However, this was _Matt's apartment._ It wasn't just some doorknob she'd break with her strength if trying to bust into a place for a case. This was different. She used the lock pick that she always kept handy. She usually had one in the rare case that she had to be stealthy during an investigation. In a matter of seconds, she was in the apartment. After she turned the knob, she hesitated with herself.

" _Was this really the right thing to do?"_

She gently pushed the door open, earning a creaking noise from it. She stepped in and closed the door behind her then proceeded to descend the stairs. And God, was it cold in there. When she reached the floor, the first thing she did was was turn completely around and walked into his bedroom. She just wanted to look at everything.

"Silk sheets, Murdock? Are you fucking kidding me?" She muttered.

She thought about how the man was in bed. She imagined he could do some amazing things with those senses. Jessica got slightly aroused at the thought, but she scoffed at herself after thinking about having sex with a dead man. She only wanted to visit. She didn't know how much more times she was going to do this, she only knew that she couldn't stop herself from doing it this one time. Maybe it would help her feel better about him.

She bet everything in there hadn't been touched since they were last in there together, which explained why the bed wasn't made. She looked at the nightstand next to the bed. She saw his cellphone, although she didn't touch it because it was probably dead after a few days anyways. Jessica knew she wasn't going to get over him if she kept things that reminded her of him.

She looked around and felt her emotions running high again, but she did her best to ignore it. His entire apartment smelt like him. She didn't like being in here without him. She just felt she that she had to say a sort of final, silent goodbye. The first thing she did was undo her scarf. Jessica looked at it as she held it in front of her. She knew it helped her at night when she needed it, and she knew it was her fucking scarf...but there was just...Matt all over it. She wrapped it up and left it coiled up on the left pillow. She figured if for some reason she needed it again, or felt the need to come back, she'd have an excuse.

"It was nice knowing you, Murdock." She spoke to herself. Jessica exited the bedroom and just looked at his entire apartment. The mess he apologized for all that time ago was _still_ there. The trophy she moved was still in the same position she had left it in. The chest he kept the in the corner was still where he'd always kept it. She had no reason or right to see what he'd kept in it, although it struck her as curious every time she thought about it.

All Jessica could do was look around the entire apartment. She felt her emotions welling up in her head. Sometimes all she could do was think about him and nothing else. She thought about him more than she cared to think about herself. She knew she was going to miss him, for long time? Perhaps. Right now, it felt like she was going to spend the rest of her life missing him.

"I miss you, Matt..." she spoke aloud into the loft.

Silence and the soul-consuming feeling of loneliness was all she got in return.

* * *

"You haven't visited in a long time. I've been worried. I'm glad to see you're alright, man." Melvin spoke as he finished touching up on the new prototype billy-club he had been working on while he was away.

"Where've you been all this time, anyways?" He asked.

"I was trapped under Midland Circle when it collapsed. I was eventually rescued but in a coma for most of my time away, as well as healing and recovering. Your armor is probably what saved me from getting completely mangled." Matt admitted. "Which was another reason I came to you, about the suit."

"Where is it? Did any of it survive the collapse?" Melvin questioned as he held the newly designed club in his hand.

"None of it. I need a completely new suit. How long do you think it'll take you to make it?"

"Everything? Jeez. At least a couple of days, maybe three or four depending on how my schedule with Betsy turns out this week." He informed. "I still have your waist and limb circumference sizes." Melvin added.

"That'll do. If I'm forced to fight ior feel obligated, I'll use my old equipment for the time being. Thank you." Matt replied. "How is she, by the way?" Matt asked, concerned with how Melvin had been while he was away.

"She's been great. She got a new full-time job. She keeps telling me that I need to expand my job as well. She thinks I should find a place with more space and better capacity for newer equipment." Melvin chuckled. "I've been cooped up in this old workshop for almost six years." He admitted.

"That's good, Melvin. It is." He smiled.

"In the meantime," Melvin approached him, "you can have this." He held the newly designed club in front of Matt. "It works the same way as the previous model." He pulled it apart to show that it could still split into to separate escrima sticks. He then twisted them back together and adjusted a small hinge on the side to show that it could still split into two sticks connected by the steel cable. "Now, here are the two new features. They make the weapon more versatile." He explained as he reconnected them once more and aimed the club at the metal bars in the window.

He pressed a button down in the middle of the stick to shoot a grapple hook that formed and ejected out of the tip of the first club. "Grapple hook. Should be strong enough to break a fall from at least a few stories. I'm sorry I can't guarantee it though, it hasn't been tested yet. However, you can also use it to shoot at someone as well." He apologized as he proceeded to show Matt the last setting of the weapon. Melvin twisted them all the way in the opposite direction and then pulled it apart to create one long pole. "It's durable enough to be used as a staff, but here's the best part." He then held it from the opposite end and tapped it on the ground. "You can also use it as a cane, so now you can keep it on you at all times just in case." Melvin reduced it to one billy club again and handed it to Matt, who gladly accepted it beginning to test it out himself.

"Melvin, this is incredible. I don't really know what to say?" Matt said, absolutely taken away as he messed with the weapons versatility.

"You don't have to say anything. Glad to see that you're back and not dead." He responded.

"Thank you." Matt thanked.

"Don't mention it, man." Melvin replied. "I'm sure Hell's Kitchen will be glad to have you back too. The only thing you should really be aware of are the other vigilantes who've been going around in your absence." Melvin told him.

"Other vigilantes?" Matt asked.

"Yeah. I mean, there's the Luke Cage guy in Harlem. Everyone knows about him. There's been another guy in Hell's Kitchen though. I've never seen it with my own eyes, but he fights people with a glowing hand. I saw it on the news a couple of times."

Matt smiled upon hearing that. He was happy to know that Danny had been going nightly patrols in Daredevil's absence like he asked him to.

"And there's the Punisher still up and about. The guy shot up an entire bar full of thugs just last week."

Matt knew Castle was still active in the city. He had yet to settle things with him once and for all, but he wasn't ready to run that train again yet. He heard nothing of Jessica, but he knew she kept her work a little more quiet. He had to visit her as soon as he figured all of this out. He missed her. Matt figured he'd stop his apartment after this. He needed to clean up. It's only been a month and a half or so since the last billy day. He paid them right on time last tome he paid them. Odds are, the utilities were still up in his apartment.

"Well, I've got to get going, Melvin. Thank you again. I'll be back in due time to pick up the new suit." He nodded and let himself out of Melvin's workshop, pocketing the billy club before walking into the closest alleyway. He had to get to rooftop level if he wanted to get into his apartment...discreetly anyways.

* * *

When Matt finally reached the rooftop, he took a deep breath before putting his hand on the doorknob. To his dismay...the door was open. He backed up a step to make sure no one was in the apartment. He listened, but heard no heartbeats nor did he pick up any body temperatures. From just outside, Matt could tell it was just as cold in there as it was outside. Maybe it was a few degrees warmer, but he knew it was going to be cold.

Once Matt stepped into his apartment, the scent of lavender and alcohol was the first thing that wafted into his face. At first he couldn't think of where he'd smelt a combination of the two before, but after a few seconds the realization struck him like a punch to the gut. He felt winded when he realized that Jessica's scent was as fresh as it was cold in his apartment. He knew it wasn't his sensory playing games on him, and he knew it wasn't his emotions toying with him.

As he descended down the stairs, he heard the hum of the refrigerator.

 _"The electricity is still on..?"_ he thought as he stood still in the apartment, letting Jessica's scent of surround him. Letting it embrace him, thought the more he embraced it, the more his longing for Jessica Jones grew. It wasn't time just yet. Matt knew he had to get one more thing out of the way first before he would leave to find her, and that was Foggy Nelson.

Matt walked over to the thermostat and turned the heat up to seventy degrees. No less than a few minutes later, the old vents in the walls started to creak and the squeak of the warm air flowing through the grills of the vents and into his apartment. Despite everything that's happened in the last couple of months, this put a grin on his face.

 _"Someone's been paying the bills?"_ As flattering as it was, and as much as he would have appreciated it, there was no way in hell it was Jessica Jones paying his bills. By what he knew of her financial situation, he knew she could barely get on with what she earned. Besides, if he asked her about her financial situation, she'd probably say something like "my financial situation is just as good as your vision, Murdock. And it's none of your business," in return. He smiled at thought.

Matt then walked into the bathroom and turned on the shower. He let out a breath of pure relief when the cold water became warm water. He undressed and stepped into the shower, the warm water immediately soothed his bruises and cuts. It felt like he'd just jumped into a snowbank after being lit on fire. Mixed with Jessica's scent in his apartment, it made him feel better. Matt wished she was here again, with him in this very moment. It got harder to resist thinking about her...and thinking about sexual intimacy with her didn't exactly either.

Matt stood there for fifteen straight, slow minutes and let the warm water hit his back. He felt ounce of pain and relaxation as the water ran over his wounds. He hadn't felt something as nice as this for eternity, it felt like. Once he felt better, he washed up quickly as he remembered he was _not_ the one paying the bills. When he was finished cleaning up, he decided it was time to get rid of the beard. It made him feel like he was homeless...probably made him look homeless too. He snipped away with a pair of scissors until it was shirt enough to save. Matt grabbed the razor he'd always kept hanging on the small rack in the shower as well as the cream and went to work, shaving away until he felt nothing but precious stubble.

When he was done, he turned the water off and grabbed one of the towels he'd kept on a shelf attached to the wall. He decided the next thing he was going to do, after calling Foggy, was go out, but not as Matt Murdock. He walked out of the bathroom wrapped in a towel and approached the chest where he kept...well, everything Daredevil. He collected his old, black ninja garb outfit and was in it within a matter of seconds. Each of his costumes were like second and third skins. It felt nice to be in the ninja outfit again. It didn't weigh him down as much as the armor did. He acquired the forearm guards and tucked the ankle holes of the pants into the the combat boots. He walked back into the the bathroom and grabbed the Melvin's new bully club. He adjusted it for the two separate sticks and holstered them at the side of his leg.

Matt walked back into his room in hopes of finding his cellphone. If memory served him correctly, he'd left it on the nightstand next to his bed. When he grabbed it, he already knew it was dead and out of power. He immediately connected it to the wire he kept plugged into an outlet behind the nightstand. As he let it charge, he took a seat on his bed, however he heard something unusual. He heard the sound of wool sliding against the patterned fabric of his pillowcase. He leaned over and slowly ran his hand along the pillow case until he ran across the woolen material. He grabbed it in his hands and quickly discovered that it was a scarf. Matt brought it up to his nose and Jessica's scent was the only thing that radiated off of it.

 _"This must be the source..."_ he thought as he smelt it one more time and frowned. Matt rested it on his lap and ran a hand down his face...in shame.

 _He smelt tears in the scarf._ Some from days ago and some fresh. The realization hit him quickly. She visited his apartment under the impression that he was dead. She left her personal belongings in a dead man's space. As if she were leaving things for him that meant something to the both of them. Something that reminds of you of that person. Other than flowers, those are the types of souvenirs you left around someone's grave. What him hardest was that he realized Jessica visited because she missed him. If he didn't know any better, she was depressed...she missed him.

Matt couldn't take it anymore. He missed Jessica too much. He knew he said he was going to call Foggy, but at the same time, he knew it could wait. Jessica Jones, on the other hand, couldn't wait...and neither could he. As he jogged up the stairs, he tied the black cloth around the top half of his face. Now it acted like mask. As he walked out into the cold, he strapped on the old combat gloves and held Jessica's scarf in his hand as he looked over the city.

Night. The city. The urban heaven. The urban hell. As fall gives way to winter, more and more people are venturing out-eager for a night out on the town before being cooped up for long weeks of freezing temperatures. They think nothing of the money they spend as they celebrate the arrival of wonderful, snowy months. There are others out tonight, who, in their own way of celebrating the departure of fall, lean months, think nothing of taking the money from them. Forcibly, if necessary. These violent young men see themselves as holding special, privileged, roles in a world which they believe houses two kinds of people: there are those people who are predators...and there are those who are prey.

The shadowy figure bursts into the night...flinging himself from rooftop to rooftop...his home...the streets. The innocent watch the vigilante move through the city. Not with admiration...but with fear. The angel of the city. The demon of the citadel. He has a rough reputation. He is still called a vigilante by many more than call him hero. He is believed by most to be a man of clenched fists, however, a hero of dignity, humor and humanity. This is where he came from. This is where's he's going.

 _It was time to show Hell's Kitchen that its Daredevil was back._

* * *

Danny Rand was out patrolling Hell's Kitchen. Like Matt asked of him before he died. He hadn't quite made a name for himself just yet. He was known, but not nearly as "infamous" as Daredevil was, as the media liked to claim. He made sure to differentiate his methods from Matt's. He let the criminal underground know that, yes Daredevil was killed, but his city wasn't for the taking. Not if the Immortal Iron Fist had something to do about it. He'd been out on patrol every night for the last month and a half.

Sometimes Colleen would join him, but she couldn't convince him to do anything otherwise with his nights. She knew he had deep respect for Matt Murdock, but she also worried about Danny. She didn't want him going down that same road. The one that could get him killed. The one that killed Matt. Danny thought about Matt every time he did this, because Matt was really the only reason Danny was doing this. It wasn't that he didn't want to, but without Matt, who was going to watch over Hell's Kitchen? Danny had failed K'un-L'un. It took him some time to realize that, but he did, and there was no more denying it.

Danny would protect New York City to make up for the city that he failed. He'd gotten a little taste alongside his team and realized that he was hooked on this city. He still had much to learn about present day New York Culture. A lot of stuff had changed since he was a kid. Just about everything he thought of was substantially different from the way it was twenty years ago, but he was adapting.

He was currently hunched over a rooftop, watching a group of thugs get ready to trade off at a weapons deal. Danny was also on the hunt for the hitman that had surprised Jessica and himself earlier that day. An armored, black jeep pulled into the dock area and, just as he suspected, the hitman hopped out of the passenger seat as his group of men jumped out out of the other three seats, armed with automatic rifles. He saw the man start to converse with other people. From where he was, he couldn't hear anything, including what they were saying.

He saw one of the men's heads suddenly flinch back in one direction. Danny looked in the same direction and only saw the large cargo crates, so he waved it off. He was trying to examine all the weapons they both had on them and were training before deciding how he was going to crash the party. One of the other men gestured in the same direction and pointed at the crates. Danny recognized that he'd beckoned the other man to take a look at the disturbance. Danny, again, waved it off as he knew just how paranoid and stupid criminals new on the job could be.

Danny watched the man slowly strut over to the crates and saw as he watched the man examine them with his guard up. After about thirty seconds, the man lowered his gun and turned around to walk back to the group. Danny turned his attention back to the main group. If he had looked for only just a few more seconds, he would have saw a figure swipe the man from in between the cargo crates and drag him into the dark. After a few minutes, the other members of the arms deal began to call out the man's name, but to no avail. Danny realized the other man had not returned yet and looked all over the place, but he was nowhere in sight. The hitman sent two of his men to check out the same area. As soon as the first one approached the crates, something hit the first thug in the head. Danny couldn't make it out, but he saw the man fall unconscious to the ground.

He saw a figure leap out from the dark and brutally attack the second gunman with his hands.

 _"What the hell?"_ Danny squinted as he watched. He needed to get a closer look so he quickly leaped off the rooftop and onto the next, running as fast as he could towards the docks. When he got there, all the other men had already been unconscious. When he got out onto the street, he saw the hitman running into an alleyway about six buildings down. Danny sprinted along the sidewalk down the street. As he got closer, he heard a couple of gunshots echoing out of the alleyway.

When Danny arrived and turned the corner, he saw the hitman on the ground, unconscious against the brick wall. Beaten and bloodied, he examined the hitman before him. This was something he hadn't ever seen before during his nights on patrol. He tried to look for whoever or whatever had just destroyed the weapons deal that he and Jessica were investigating. Speaking of Jessica, he decided he needed to call her about this regardless of how late it had been in the moment.

* * *

Jessica was already asleep and in bed. She'd gotten to sleep a little more easily this time around. She had drank less alcohol tonight, but the thought of "Martyr Murdock" still kept her up longer than she had really anticipated. She missed him so goddamn much and simply thought about him _constantly._ It was almost something that she felt was out of her control. It had been almost two months now, but she still didn't want to accept the fact that he was dead.

She woke up to the sound of her ringtone going off. She had to keep ringer volume up because if it didn't, she wouldn't have an alarm to wake her up when she needed it to, so she ignored the call completely. Then it started ringing again, and she almost shouted "what the fuck?!" She rolled over to grab it over the nightstand and brought up to her face. She just woke up and her eyes needed time to to adjust to the light. Before she could get a good luck at who was calling, the call went off. Jessica sighed and closed her eyes again and rested the phone at her side. Not two seconds later it began ringing again and she let out a loud growl.

She read the screen and saw that it was Danny.

"What the FUCK do you want, Jackie Chan?!" She nearly shouted.

"Good morning to you too, Jessica." He replied happily. He was egging her on.

"Stop with the jokes, moron." She chastised.

"You started it."

"What the hell do you want, Danny?!" She made sure the anger in her voice was clear through the phone.

"Jess, calm down, please. It's about the weapons deal," he began, "I was watching the group when the hitman we fought with earlier arrived."

This opened Jessica's eyes now. "I'm listening." She remarked.

"I was watching them until it was time to strike. Then all of a sudden, a man came out of absolutely nowhere and began assaulting them. By the time I actually got to the scene, they were all unconscious."

"What do you mean they were assaulted? By who?!" She asked.

"That's the thing. I have no idea? It was some guy." He answered. "I saw the hitman run into an alley about six or seven buildings down, but when I got to him he was already beaten half to death lying on the pavement."

"You didn't even get a glimpse of who did it?" Jessica was truly taken aback. This actually had her attention.

"Nothing. Whoever it was didn't leave any trace at all."

Just then Jessica heard the fire escape on the other side of her apartment rattle. Someone was using it to get in. She got out of bed, quickly put on pants and shirt as she held her cellphone with Danny still on the other end of the line.

"Sorry Iron Clad, I gotta go. I'll call you back." She said as she took the phone away from her ear.

"Are you okay, Jessica? What's going o-." Before he could finish, Jessica had already hung up the phone. She heard more rustling and struggling as she walked out of her bedroom and into the small Kitchen. As soon as she turned the corner, she saw a man dressed in all black. The first thing she noticed was what he was holding in his hand. It looked like a scarf, and with whatever light she had seeping through the window. She was almost certain it was her scarf. The situation was starting to scare her.

"Get the fuck out of my house before I knock your goddamn teeth out. What the fuck are you doing in my house?!" She asked angrily, trying to hide whatever fear was really there. As she approached the man, he backed up with every footstep she took towards him and held out a hand to her.

"Jessica please, I don't want to fight, I need to talk. I need to show you something..." He drifted off. Matt began to choke on his words. "Let me explain, please."

Jessica stopped in her own footsteps at the sound of the Matt's voice.

 _"That voice,"_ she thought. _"It couldn't be."_ Whoever this was, they were trying to play games, but the sound of his voice kept her at bay and from beating him so bad he wouldn't be able to speak again.

Her eyes widened as she looked at the man's face now that she was a little closer. She saw the top half of his face was covered by a cloth of some sort. She watched as he rolled his mask up passed his forehead. Jessica's eyes widened in both horror and shock.

 _"How could this be?"_ She thought.

Her heart started to race and her body temperature rose. She was sweating now. If this was real, then she knew he'd be able to tell.

"Jessica." He called out. "It's me, Jess...it's Matt." He spoke softly, sorrow burning in his tone.

Jessica's world froze in place. It's like everything that happened at Midland Circle was flashing before her eyes. Jessica felt tears welling in her eyes as she took a step back.

"M-Murdock? But how did you-" She began choking on her own words, each word rasping over the other as she seemingly forgot how to speak. She realized what was happening and she began to get angry. Sad angry. She approached him in a speed-walking fashion and grabbed him with both hands by the collar of his shirt. Jessica lifted him up and nearly smashed him into the wall to their left, pinning him against it.

"How the _fuck_ are you still alive, Murdock? You're supposed to be dead!" She shouted, gripping his shirt tighter until her knuckles turned white.

"Jess. Jess! Let me explain." He tried to speak softly but she began holding him against the wall by pressing into the pressure points in front of his shoulders.

"You stayed down there and made us all think we failed you, Matt! You left me thinking there was some way I could have saved you!" She lowered her voice, but it was still loud enough. He could hear the sadness in her voice and he could feel the tears building in her eyes.

"I've spent every goddamn night drinking or crying myself to sleep, or both because you and your dumbass martyr syndrome! I've spent every fucking second of every day since Midland Circle missing you! And now you think you can just come back like it's no big deal at all. Well fuck you, Matt! Fuck you..." At last, she began to feel weak in her knees. Jessica's arms began to shake and a few seconds later she dropped him back onto his feet. The tears spilt out of her eyes as she leaned into his chest, letting her essence fall into him.

He quickly wrapped his arms around her in a tight embrace, holding her as she let out the last of her raw emotions.

"I've got you. It'll be alright, Jessica." He muffled into her hair as he kissed the side of her temple. Never not once, had he seen Jessica Jones so vulnerable...so open about her feelings. He didn't even know she could feel like this, if he was being frank. The overwhelming sensation of finally having her in his arms made him feel happy to be alive. Made him realize that coming here was truly the right decision. Jessica quickly wiped her tears away and looked up at him with a scoff.

"I don't need your fucking comfort, Murdock, or your stupid apologies." She used her arms to push him away only a little bit before she brought her face closer to his, their lips mere centimeters apart. Matt felt his spine tingle as her warm, damp breath blew against his neck.

 _"I need you."_

The longing in her voice exuded into her tone as she brought her lips to his with a pace he wasn't prepared to match at first. She let her take control and do what she felt she needed to before finally matching her with same passion. After thirty seconds or so, Matt pulled away and moved his head upwards, kissing the last of those tears away. He was going to make sure Jessica never had to cry again. She used her strength to bring him back down, this time mashing her lips with his as she cupped his face in both her hands.

Matt pushed himself off of the wall and wrapped his hands around her back, dragging the hem of her shirt up her back and over her head as they moved back into her bedroom. She ripped the mask off his head and threw it on the ground. Jessica almost ripped his shirt off and threw it on the opposite side of the room as he undid her pants. As they bumped into her bed, he turned them around and laid her down on her back. He ripped off his gloves and put one of his hands around her ass while wrapping the other around her back, pressing himself closer to her.

He parted his lips away from hers so he could kiss and gently nibble on her breasts. She moaned as she leaned her head back and undid his belt buckle. In no time, Matt kicked his boots off and she helped remove his pants and boxers. He went to reach for Jessica's underwear but realized she wasn't even wearing any. This made him chuckle as he brought his lips to hers with another kiss of fervor. Jessica moaned into his mouth as he used his hands to play with her breasts.

"I'm so sorry, Jessica." He whispered as he left soft kisses on her neck, even leaving gentle nibbles on her skin as he made his way down. "I'll do whatever it takes to makes it up to you." He picked her up slightly and moved themselves upwards so her head now rested on a pillow. She grabbed his head and brought it back up to her own. She stared into his unseeing eyes. How beautiful they were in their dormant state.

"Promise me you won't do something so fucking stupid _ever_ again." Her voice was calm, yet stern. Matt left a soft peck on her forehead as he wrapped one of his hands around hers.

He chuckled softly. "I promise you, Jessica. I won't do something _so_ fucking stupid ever again." He spoke as she pulled his lips down to meet hers once more in a heated, make out fashion.

 _For the first time in what felt like years...she smiled._

* * *

 **AN: Hello everyone! I apologize for the wait! Really! My schedule got really uptight with work and school. I wanted to get this chapter out two days ago, but my schedule was literally kicking me in the ass. I would have posted it hours before 1:40 in the fucking morning, but my sister decided to run her hands over every button on my laptop and caused it to shut down. As I feared, it didn't save my hours worth of progress so I had to rewrite a lot, then continue from where I left off. If it feels a little rushed, I do apologize for that as well. Since I have school in a few hours, I don't really have much else to say! Thanks for reading, and until next time!**


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